What's Next?

It has been years since my last post... Yup, I'm totally forget about this blog. Scroll down the old posts and those posts really make me think.
What is next? Always the magic question come popup to my head. 'what's next?', lepas ni apa?
Said that really hate doing thesis (4 years back), yet now I'd done another thesis (by research).
And really this magic question come up. What's next?
Should I or shouldn't I go to the next level?

Human are never satisfied.

and....

so do I

..Mati itu pasti..

'Setiap yang bernyawa, pasti akan menemui kematian'

Bait-bait perkataan yang selalu kita dengar. Dan minggu ni jugak, banyak kematian yang berlaku kat sekeliling. Even kalau jenguk newspaper pun (tak tau la keluaran bila, tapi baca jugak sebab paper tu dh jadi alas meja..), kos untuk mati pun tinggi. Nak upah gali kubur, mandi mayat lagi, kain kapan. Tu tak masuk lagi upah batu nisan la, yang design lawa-lawa tu lagi la mahal. Macam seolah-olah kita kena menyimpan untuk uruskan kematian diri sendiri. (memang patut pun menyimpan untuk kematian diri sendiri ..) .

Sebut pasal mati ni, teringat pulak kat satu ceramah seorang ustaz ni. Ustaz ni kata, kita ni hidup untuk buat macam-macam. Nak ibadat pun time hidup, nak mintak maaf kat Tuhan dan manusia pun time hidup. Sebab time dah mati, kita dah tak boleh buat apa pun. Even mandi dan kapan pun, orang lain kena buat untuk diri kita.

So, ambillah kesempatan time kita hidup ni untuk minta maaf, untuk itu dan ini. Sebab, kalau dah mati, dah tak boleh buat apa-apa pun..

It's 'multiplex' or 'multi-pelik'

It's soo hard. I don't know what to do n to think for my study. Been thinking. Sometimes, the most joyful n relax time is during your undergrad. So, for those who still studying, Enjoy ur life to the fullest!!!! :-P

solitude, transformation and amendment

dahulu dan sekarang,

semua sudah berubah,

tapi,

bukan semua itu membawa kepada kebaikan,

ya.....

seha dulu dan seha sekarang yang lain....

mungkin hilang seketika,

lalu timbul yang baharu,

namun, bukan semua itu baik

mungkin seha yang dulu tidak patut berubah

mungkin seha sekarang terlalu banyak berubah

ada yang perlu diubah,

ada yang perlu dikekalkan

ketuk pintu hati

tanya peribadi

apakah patut diubah

apakah patut dikekalkan

sekdar menjengah dasar hati yang telah lama sendiri

harap seha itu dapat mencari diri sendiri

untiltle.....

when u just don't know what to do, bored with everything- jobs, life.. everything just bored.. dunno wat to do... arghhh..... what should i do..... GOD, please lead me your way, so can i choose the right path... straight to you....

i'm sorry... i can forgive, but i'll never forget...

juz few hours, i'll finish my study... n here, I'm getting melancholic.. feels like a child trapped in a teen body (i'm a teen?? or adult already?? dunno n dun care..) may be i juz not grow up in suppose-to-be way, or i juz couldn't cope with everything.. everything being strain and i want to be better person. people around me and environment i live in made me like this. juz simple, yet very complicated person on earth. i envy seeing my friends talk to their family like friends when i couldn't be like that. true, the situation getting better. yet, it seems that still i cannot forget the past. when the situations are repeating themselves, only on difference people and it produce different outcome, it seems time being means to me. like it mocking me because who i am. like i dun deserve better treatment. sorry and sorry.. i juz being me. even i know, i deserve things, but in my heart, there's a small voice said who i am to be deserve like that. please memories, juz go away...... juz go, like it never exist..... i want to be a better person...

few more hours

few more hours, we will say goodbye to each other.. 4 years had passed.. i hope, even we say good bye this time, we will meet again. all good and bad memories will be kept close to my heart, as they will be the memories of you and me together. so long my friends. if this is the last time we are together, i hope you will be success and remember all those memories we created together... good bye...